Welcome to Hump Day Diet Tips, a weekly section with two simple tips for how to feel thinner without working out. Because not everyone’s friends with a guy named gym.

This week we have three tips that apply to the holidays and pictures, so you can still eat as many beans, greens, potatoes and tomatoes as your soulll desires.

Post a Picture with a Baby

It’s that time of year. Posting a picture with your cutest niece/nephew cleanses a multitude of sins. Bros do it to prove they still are human beings with a heart and feelings and get an awww from the ladies. Everyone else does it because they’re genuinely excited to be with their family and appreciate the miracle of new life. Either way, after three helpings of apple walnut stuffing, cheesy potatoes and black cherry jello (fam faves), plop a relative on your most forgiving sweater and let everyone’s heart auto-zoom on Caleb’s cute face.

Or Post a Picture of Yourself as a Baby

I love these photos. The best young child photos I’ve ever seen are from my friend Chu.

I can’t get enough. With baby swag like that, it’s no wonder Chu now makes dope ass videos with poignant and powerful thoughts on current events like this. 

This is my favorite one my Grandma still has of me.

I’d like to think I’m as cool as I was in this picture, but I definitely peaked here at age 4.

Never Take a a Selfie Group Photo Yourself

I woke up like this! I was trying to capture a magical work team moment from the front of an Uber XL but ended up capturing a chin XL heinous enough to make you never eat dinner rolls again for as long as you live. Holy schmokes what an atrocity. Take it from me, no selfie group photos this Thanksgiving. After seeing this, I Googled neck exercises for the first time in my life. On the plus side, my lack of selfie ability might make me the best millennial on Earth. When the camera flashed on this selfie, every Baby Boomer alive felt a mysterious, magical tingle.

Holy shit that’s a horrible picture. I can’t believe I just posted it. I hope it helps me get a lot of likes on this post.

For more ways to feel thinner without working out, read the article that started it all. And turn down the temperature so everything shrinks.